Episode Transcript
Have you ever been going through something and your friends or family around you just say, oh, just let it go. Have you ever thought to yourself, I'd really like to let go of this problem, or let go of these emotions, or let go of this pain that I have? We are gonna be talking about what letting go actually means here on the Spiritual American. We Americans enjoy a wonderful and powerful way of life, but internally and in relationships we may wish for better. Join me as we look beneath the surface and gain insights to transform every aspect of your life. My name is Dr. Anne O'Hare, and this is the Spiritual American. Welcome back everyone. So today the title is The Courage to Let Go, and so many things are going through my mind. With this, I'm gonna try to focus on one aspect. One aspect that I'd like to talk about is that sometimes people tell us to do things and we can't seem to be successful doing it. One of them is letting go. Another one that I have had trouble with is, oh, just think positive. I think there's something else we need to deal with here. So I'm gonna share from my own experience and my own understanding a little bit about what the subtle aspect is of letting go and what is it all about. If you've been watching the podcast, we've talked about a lot of things over the last a hundred and something episodes, a lot of things, what's going on in our mind? One of the episodes was, is the mind gaslighting me. I can put it here also. Maybe I shouldn't be believing the mind. Like there's all different things that are going on in the mind with thoughts, let's say, but then there's feelings, right? We have moods, we have feelings, we have emotions. We have all this, and people say, oh, just let it go. It doesn't matter. It's not so easy, right? Wouldn't it be great if we could just go, okay, I let it go. I remember watching something years ago in psychology, maybe it wasn't psychology, but years ago. There was this program there like, okay, well you have the thing and you're holding onto it. I'm holding a pen now you have a pen? I'm holding the pen. So I'm holding onto it. And now just let go. Let go of the pen. Okay, let go. So you see that visual and it makes sense and okay, I'll just let go, but then I can't let go, so why can't I let go? So today I'm gonna talk about fear in particular. I think many of our repetitive thoughts and sorrow producing ideas are based in fear. I'm afraid of being alone. I'm afraid of doing something wrong. I'm afraid of being attacked. I'm afraid that maybe I'm not good enough. I am hoping that some of you can understand what I'm talking about. This is for me, this was going on and still is. I'm working on it, going on in the background. This kind of low level fear, low level worry, low level feeling of danger going on. And I was thinking today, how can I let go of that? I've been thinking about this for a while. How can I let go of it? So I'd like to share with you some of these, the thoughts that I had about this. One thing is identifying our thoughts and feelings, and we've had many, many episodes on this. So instead of just saying to myself, oh, I'm not gonna do that thing, I don't like those people, and just not, and just stopping what I'm doing because of the fear or because of the thoughts. Take a minute and figure out what is it that I actually think. What is it that I'm actually feeling? So I'm thinking, oh, I'm not gonna be able to do that. I'm gonna mess it up. Or they don't really like me, or I'm not getting a chance, or I'm not getting respect. There's so many ideas and thoughts. Those thoughts are there. And then what are the feelings that are there? If I have those thoughts, those self-defeating thoughts going on, I'm going to feel pretty bad inside about myself, but the fear I think is coming because those thoughts are running and the fear is there because it's like I don't feel free in my own mind. This is a subtle thing and I'm going here because when people say let go, and then you can't let go. The the thing I think I would think is that I failed. I can't let go. It's not that we can't let go. I feel like it's, we don't understand what we need to let go of and how to let go. So there's the, there's this underlying fear. I'm reacting to these thoughts and feelings and that I don't feel safe. I don't feel content, I don't feel happy. I don't feel, because I'm dealing with all this, these thoughts and feelings that are going on all the time in my mind. So what do I need to do? I need to look and see what is the belief? So there's, this is one way to begin to look at this thing. What are some of the beliefs, one belief or some of the beliefs that I have? Where did they come from? Maybe from my upbringing, maybe from religion, maybe from society. There's all kinds of conditioning that we have. I'm sure there's a lot of you out there that have been looking into this already. Conditioning based on being a male or female, conditioning based on religion, conditioning based on race, conditioning based on culture. There's a lot of conditioning, social conditioning, political conditioning. So what kind of beliefs do I have? And what happens is that I have these beliefs and then I find myself failing. So there's the judge. There's a judge in there judging me against this belief. You are supposed to be this way, and now you're not being this way. So how can I let go if that's going on all the time? I believe this thing and it's constantly condemning me for not being successful. Can you see how it's not so easy to let go? Letting go means that I am willing to look at what's going on in my mind, and I'm willing to cut off the energy flow to that negativity, self-defeating things that are going on in my mind, the emotions. How do I cut off the energy supply? And this is where spirituality comes in. So I'm getting right to the heart of the spiritual matter here in terms of letting go. Letting go means that I no longer am associated with that thing. Think about if you left a relationship, maybe a marriage or a relationship or, or a job even, right? Or whatever. You leave the thing and then you are no longer associated with it, and then you forget it, right? It's no longer yours. So this thing that's going on in our mind, we have to get to the point where we're noticing it, we're naming it. I'm noticing that I believe it, at least I am still reacting to it. So something must believe it. It. And then I'm gonna tell myself now I want to let it go. This is not so easy. It's simple. It's very simple, and I'm gonna describe what to do and then we're gonna practice. It's very simple. I have to tell myself I'm a soul. I'm an incorporeal soul. I'm a soul. I am peaceful, pure, beautiful living light. And in that awareness, none of this stuff is relevant and I'm perfectly whole and complete and safe. It doesn't mean that I'm gonna hold that awareness forever and ever and ever, and I'm never gonna think about this. I'm never gonna do any actions. Don't, don't go down that road. It's not that. It's just in the moment. In the moment. What is this thing letting go? The courage to let go means that in the moment when the mind is going and the emotions are going, instead of fighting, which I'm usually doing, I'm fighting and I'm in pain, I'm fighting, and I'm in pain. So I'm telling myself instead, I'm not even going to engage. That's spirituality. That's bodiless stage. And I'm here to tell you that's what works. That is letting go because in the moment you have decided I will not engage with this. I feel that it takes time to be able to get to that point because we have to be honest about how attached we are to the belief systems and the ideas and so forth that are going on in our minds. But I'll give an example. So let's say I grew up in a house. This is true. I grew up in a house where, if you said a wrong word, like a word incorrectly, you were immediately corrected. Speaking correctly was very valued and very important. And so if I ever said a word wrong, I knew it was coming, you know. So now growing, grown up now, and let's say I'm in a, a meeting and I'm listening to somebody else talk and they're saying a word wrong, and they're mispronouncing words and they're speaking too softly and I can't hear them. All of a sudden there's a raging irritability going on inside of me now. Now I can start blaming them, which believe me, I did for years. They're though doing this and they're, I, they need to be doing this and they need to be doing that. What is that? I'm repeating the pattern because that's what I was exposed to. That's what I believed in and that's what I'm, but in the meeting I can't say anything. So I'm sitting here wrrithing in irritability and anger 'cause something's wrong and. So I had to work on that internally. How do I do that? I had to detach from that reaction. That's letting go. Removing the energy source from that reaction is letting go. We know we can't control the outside. This is nothing new. Can't control it. And honestly, we probably don't even wanna control it. Don't we just wanna feel better? Don't we just wanna feel powerful? So let's practice for a moment. I hope that felt like it was a thought that maybe you could use. There's beliefs and thoughts and feelings going on. If you find that you would like to get some power over them or to be able to let them go first, you have to identify them thoughts, feelings, and beliefs, identify them, and then when you've identified them and figured out, maybe had an idea of where they came from. No blaming. Then you can in the moment when they're happening, practice detaching from them. I'm not even gonna engage. I'm a soul. My nature is peace. Nothing outside in the circumstances are gonna change when you do that, but you will be freeing yourself from the inner world of pain and whatever else is going on in there. That's letting go. So let's practice for a moment. So sitting quietly, we'll just do a moment or two of reflection. So just think about one or two ideas that maybe you have about yourself. About measuring up about your abilities. Notice how maybe in the past, how those ideas have maybe caused pain or maybe you experienced not measuring up. And what kind of internal thoughts and feelings have been going on inside. So even though we're reflecting, just imagine right now that maybe you feel disappointed in yourself. So imagine feeling. We've all probably felt that. So we imagine feeling disappointed, feeling afraid, feeling, regret, and then in that moment realize this is based on a belief, an idea, a thought. The feelings are based on a belief, and in this moment, I'm going to detach completely from that whole system. I am a soul. I am living consciousness. I am the eternal living light. And in that moment, I have let go. Okay, gently bring yourself back to waking awareness. Move around a little bit and we're back. So that was a very short little meditation, but just an idea that this is all going on in inside has nothing to do with the circumstances. It has nothing to do with your relationships. This is about freeing myself from sorrow by using my intellect to discern what's going on inside, and then using the power of spirituality, the power of silence, the power of yoga, the power of knowledge to pull myself away from that sorrow producing internal situation. So I'll leave it there. I hope again that you have found something that you can try. Next time you find yourself in a fast thinking, fast, emotional, moving situation, see if you can use some of these principles. So remember, our slogan is Heal, Empower and Serve. And until next time, take care.
